in 3 days!

hi babygirl!

i'll be flying to LA to visit you in 3 short days! your mom is picking me up at the airport, and i can hardly wait. i think you'll be at your grandparents' house, so we'll be heading over straight from LAX.

i was just in Cancun, Mexico this past week...and even on vacation, we facetimed. maaaaan, you are growing up to be such a little sassy lady! you've got so much 'tude..and i couldn't be happier to see your face every time the screens connect. you're already trying to stand on your own, even though your balance isn't 100% yet. when mommy tries to help you, you just take her arms off, as if saying "i can do it myself, mama!". ong ngoai and ba ngoai are so proud of you too...and you want to know what ong ngoai said? he told me, as happy as he was that you're going to have a baby sister or brother--he can't help but feel sad that you won't have ALL the attention anymore. i laughed a little, and told him "don't worry dad, K is aaaaaaaalways going to be loved. she'll always be our first baby" even though i secretly felt the same.

you're such a smart, courageous, sweet, gentle, strong little thing...and we just want you to shine without anyone else taking away from your light. but i also know that your baby sister or brother will just make more room in our hearts. and if he or she is anything like you, we'll love them just as much...and lucky us, we'll have 2 perfect little beings to add to the family!

i can't wait to blow raspberries with you, and huff and puff like a dog (it's 2 of your favorite things to do these days). but mostly, i just can't wait to hug you and kiss you to pieces!

so many updates, so little time

hi bug,

so I was cooking earlier..and then when I finished, I realized I didn't have anything else to do. it's Sunday, 11/16/14, and I'm in my apartment that I share with uncle Jared. we are now engaged to be married..and somewhere along the way, I've ceased to hate being here. I still don't love it, and I doubt that moment will ever come, but for now...I can stand it.

this morning, I woke to a text from my neighbor Alexis, asking if we could walk and feed her dog for her. I of course obliged, especially bc she and her bf came by to feed/watch Bruno while we were in LA last month (when we got engaged!)

so anyway, I digress..this morning we woke up, uncle Jared made breakfast, watched a little tv, showered, and went down to walk Hank. we decided to go to Dunkin Donuts. it was a nice little walk, mostly because I bought a thick winter jacket yesterday, so I was able to enjoy the weather a bit more. hmm, maybe that's why I'm not hating it as much? it's colllllld here!! making me miss the warmth of LA that much more :(

oh, we also facetimed this morning! you had just woken up, and had crazy hair...and an even crazier big ole smile for me! I just love seeing your adorable little face light up every time you see me on the screen. your mom told your grandparents last night about her pregnancy. you're going to be a big sister!!! I am so so so excited to see what this little boo is going to look like..what is he/she going to sound like? will it be as active as you? as happy as you? will he or she say "da da da da!" and stick out their little tongue when they're trying to focus? will he/she be as independent as you? you tend to take off your mom's arm when she's holding you, as if saying "I can do it on my own!!" even though you care barely hold yourself up. you're crawling pretty fast nowadays, and you love exploring.

I feel like I'm missing all your milestones while I'm on the east coast...but I know I'll be moving back soon...so I'll be there for the bigger ones. like you starting kindergarten! and meeting your little brother or sister! I'm going to try to be there for his/her birth too, like I was with yours. I'm sure you already heard me say this plenty, but I SAW YOU FIRST!! you make me so happy, and so proud...even when you fell off the bed last week (oops mommy), you were all smiles a few hours later. you're such a tough little cookie. like your ba ngoai ;)

you're going to be my little flower girl..and I know you don't know what that means yet (you're 8 months), but I just can't wait to see you in a pretty little dress! Cadence will walk with you. (uncle Jared's goddaughter)

anyway, I made Japanese chicken curry..I also made an apple cake yesterday. and later, we're making philly cheesesteaks. lots of food over here! I miss you a ton..and can't wait to give you little squeezes when I'm home next month for xmas! Speaking of.....what should I get you?!! hmm..

love you, bug.

5 weeks

hi bug!

so i've been gone for almost 5 weeks now..and you've just been getting smarter, stronger, and a tiny bit bigger. i'm coming home in about 2 weeks, and i just cannot wait to see you. i can't wait to squeeze your little body in my arms!!

mommy and grandpa took you to the park, and you had such a blast last weekend. they sent me pictures and videos of grandpa swinging you. he was so afraid your arms might pop out of your shoulder sockets, but you kept asking for more (by just falling backwards), and squealing in delight when he swung you. tough little nugget.

mommy said you LOVE bathtime! and last night, we were going to facetime, but you had to go to red robin to celebrate madison or ben's award...so we'll facetime tonight. every time we see each other, you give me a big ol' smile...and it always lights up my day! it's been really hard living out here, with no friends, and no family. one day, if you ever think about moving away.....just know that it may be hard at first. well, it may be hard for a long time, but it's a good learning experience. i definitely want to move back, and soon!

we also got a little kitten, his name is Bruno. he's a troublemaker...but pretty cute. hopefully you'll meet him soon! i gotta get ready for my interview today--keep your tiny chubby fingers crossed for me!

love you to the moon.

home: check!

we found our apartment, little bug! can't wait for you to come visit!!!!

i normally hate touristy things, but i cannot waaaaaaaaait until you come so i can take ya ;)


love and miss you.

your mom took you camping, and i'm not thrilled about it.

one month-ish away

so bug, I'm going to be moving...it's official. i'll be leaving on a jet plane gas-powered car.

20 years in this city..and the saddest part about leaving it, is the smallest being, whom i've only known just about 5 months. yep...you guessed it..i'm really, reaaaaaaaaaaally sad to be even further away from you. mommy is just going to have to up her photo + video game!

i love watching you grow, watching you grab onto things with ease, watching you sleep, watching you eat (bc you're usually so lazy about it), watching you roll from your back to your tummy, and back to your back again, watching you smile so big your mouth can barely contain it, watching you step on my stomach and bounce, watching you slowly blink and look away, watching you turn your head as far as you can to follow whatever object you're staring at, watching you squeal and scream from excitement, watching you dance, watching you pout at the sight of ong ngoai, watching you grab your little ears, watching you reach for your toes--ready to chomp, watching your gummy smile, watching you suck on your little bear, watching you rest with your pacifier (finally satisfied), watching you wake up and stare at the fan..

i love it all, and i really don't want to miss anything.......i'm already missing so much, everyday.

i just want you to know...no matter how far i am, i'll be thinking of you everyday. several times a day, actually!! love you to pieces.

laughing

hi baby bug,

i'm so so so excited to see you tomorrow! i'll be driving to you 1st thing in the morning. you've been laughing sooo much in your videos--actually making laughing sounds, and i just can't wait to see it for myself.

you're 4 months, and right now, you're really into putting things in your mouth. usually it's a burp cloth, sometimes it's your hand, but yesterday, auntie Kim put a sock on your hand...and you were going to town!

i mean..i've never seen you more excited. look!

apparently mommy's going to get a massage on saturday, while i'm watching you. she keeps doing that! taking advantage much?!! can't wait to shower you with kisses, raspberries, and sniffs.

love you to the moon & back!

me + you..you + me

we are going to have 2 whole days together!! weeeeeeeeee!

mommy asked me if I could babysit you on july 17th and 18th..

well, the thing is, auntie tuvy will be traveling to NY and Montreal from july 4th through the 16th..in which, I will be landing in LA at 12:41am. O_O by myself...bc uncle jared is going to VA to attend his cousin's bachelor party. anyway, I digress.


so seeing as I was already taking 8 weeks off...I didnt think my boss would let me take an additional two...for you :( but I thought, hey, what the heck. I won't know unless I ask, right?

..........and he grudgingly said YESSSS!!!!!!!!!!!

weeeeeeee!!!! (scream it with me!!!)

I'll land at LAX at 12:41 --> drive to appley valley...get there around 3am

sleep....until your mommy wakes me..

and then it'll just be the two of us! :D

I know you can't tell your feet from your own body yet..
but I couldn't be more egg-cited to see my little eggie for 2 whole days!

missing you. <3

upchucking

my poor little bug's got a bug.

i can't believe what a good baby you are. so much that, i never really hear you cry...so you could imagine my fear/horror/sadness when i heard you let out a big shrieking cry, tears and all.


i wasn't sure if it was just something i did...but ong ngoai and i both said "geez, it's like someone just stabbed her with a knife!"

the next day, mommy said that you had been throwing up, on father's day, at grandpa bill's house.

you poor thing. i imagined you, sitting there, smiling, happy as can be, and then the next second, crying your little eyes out. we think it's a stomach virus. mommy took a day off work (on wednesday) and you felt better! hopefully, no more throwing up...no more pain...no more tears.

even as sick as you were, you'd give mommy a few smiles..and you were still gnawing on that elephant blankie of yours. mommy said she named your elephant "Ella". Ella the elephant. she went against my advice of naming her Carol. Carol the elephant. isn't that cuter?

i miss you so so so much...no matter how many videos mommy sends, i always ask for more. let's hope she sends some soon!

t r o i s m o i s

Happy THREE months, little bug!

I'm sorry I've slacked off (yet again!) with my entries. I'll try to be better about it, because when I think about you reading them...it really does make my heart happy :)

I'll try to recount all the things that have been happening. Uncle Jared and I went to visit you last weekend. Daddy was camping with his buddies for the weekend, so we hung out with you and mommy. But mommy said he must have been missing you guys a lot, because he kept texting her. Of course he missed you, you perfect little thing, you!

I changed your diapers a few times..man oh man. I love you, but that stuff is NOT pretty.

We went with Uncle Jon, Auntie Kim, Jacob, Madison, and Ben to watch a roller derby match. You seemed pretty uninterested, but you stayed up the entire time. Very impressive. As soon as we came back home, you ate, and then passed out within 3 minutes.

The next day, daddy came home by 7am..and ran straight to you!

You've been growing..and it's amazing to see. You stare at the ceiling fan with wonder, and you love being around people. You don't like being held too much--I get it, you need your space. But you love love love when we talk to you. You're starting to make cooing noises, and are trying to talk back!

You still hate tummy time, but sometimes mommy lets you do tummy time on her, and you seem to find that acceptable.

I love watching you sleep, I love watching you eat, I love watching you smile and laugh.

Your hair is starting to fall, so you have a few patches...but don't worry..cuteness level is still at an all-time high! Love you, baby.

picture perfect <3

time is FLYING!

Hi bug!

I've been slacking with the posts..and so much has happened with you! You're an expert at tummy time now, you're back to only drinking breast milk, and we had a beautiful photoshoot last weekend with Auntie Serena!

Here are a few of my favorites:

wishing I could bottle up your scent. (we're wearing pink matching headbands! and yes, I stole one of yours)

that silly little tongue :P

everybody's FAVORITE. look at those eyes!

 

I love these photos of you soo much! She's sending the rest soon..so we cannot wait to see them! You poor thing, you were so tired of taking pictures..too much time spent awake. And we kept making noises to get your attention. Once we were done, you slept for about 2 hours, completely out! Mommy thought you were sick, because you weren't acting like yourself, but turns out, you were just overworked. Modeling is tough.

 

You might be coming to ong ngoai and ba ngoai's after Easter. Ba ngoai is staying home for a few days due to remodeling at the salon--so she wants to see you! Well, we ALL do :) Super excited to be taking you back with me. Everyday Mommy is sending us photos and videos of you..and we can't get enough. You're growing so fast, I feel a change every time I hold you. On one hand, I can't wait for you to be running and playing soon...and on the other, I wish you'd just stay tiny forever. Either way, it's a win win situation!

 

bisous!

 

 

thirsty thursdays

hi bug!

so this blog is to jot down all the fun/sad/milestone memories before my brain becomes too old, and i have but one mediocre story to tell you of your childhood..

but it's also to let you know what was going on in this time, while you were too young of a bug to understand/grasp your great big world. because let's face it, right now, all you really care abut is the boob, and a clean diaper. and maybe gas. lots of gas. but we don't need to talk about that.

it's thursday, and it's the first day of SPRING! flowers are blooming, as are my allergies. people often refer to thursdays as "thirsty thursday"...just another excuse to drink. but you won't be drinking until you're 27. because under 21 is illegal, and 21, is just too ambitious. and i don't want you to be drinking nasty/cheap/strong concoctions made my frat boys with an IQ of 4. so we'll keep alcohol away from you for as long as possible. or maybe you'll be like mommy, and not even care for it.

remember to not let anyone pressure you into drinking. it's not cool, it doesnt taste that great...you probably won't build the tastebuds for it until you're in your late 20s/early 30s IF you do at all. so, have a drink with the family, if you're really curious..but if you don't like it, or you don't feel like it--don't let anyone sway you otherwise. also, always be responsible. if you drink, don't drive...and don't get into someone's car if they've been drinking. call a cab, call mommy to pick you up, or call ME! ong ngoai always told me "a cab fare might be $100...but a DUI is thousands of dollars." and it's true.

funny how your parents are always right.

xx!

2nd chance

little bug,

it took me 3 whole hours to get to you on friday!

you were sleeping, but i woke you up and held you for a little bit while mommy took a nap. i had it all planned out, hang out with you until sunday morning, then drive back to LA to go to my friend jessica's baby shower. then later that night, i got a text that told me the shower was on saturday!

:(

i was sooo mad at myself for miscalculating my week! the next morning, mommy brought you in while i was sleeping, and woke me up. you were so happy and squirmy, per usual. so we walked over to her room, and laid down on the mat to watch you stare at the ceiling. it's amazing how something so boring can be so fun with the perfect little partner.

though i was sad that i had to leave you so soon..ong ngoai is picking you and mommy up today, and bringing you guys to his house! i'll see you after work, my little gummi bear. everything worked out ;)

right now, my favorite thing to do with you, is see your arms fall to the side when you fall asleep. it's the funniest thing! i was holding you friday night, and i asked your daddy to record it...hahahaha..entertainment for HOURS!


oh, and your uncle andrew and i are planning to record a song for you. just so that when i'm not there to sing to you...you can hear my voice. i chose the song Tonight You Belong To Me..and even though uncle andrew's skeptical of singing it with me, i plan on convincing him :D

xx!

TGIF!

hey lovebug,

i'm going to visit you today! i've been anxiously waiting for the day to be over...so i can get on my way and drive an hr and a half to see you. well, the driving part, i can do without...but i can't wait to see you and kiss you, and squeeeeze you softly, and talk to you.

mommy's been sending me pictures of you sleeping--like her, with your mouth wide open. so hilarious! today she sent me a video of you doing tummy time...and poor thing, you haaaaated it! you cried a little, while she was encouraging you to life your head up. it'll get easier, booboo.


i hope you're camera ready, because i'm planning to document allll our hours together!
love you so much, and see you soon! oh, and i'm also ditching work a tad bit early to beat all this friday traffic :D

the day after

you had to be in the hospital for 24 hrs, just precautionary procedure...
but we couldn't wait to see you again!!

so in we went, to just hold you...while you slept. no fussing. what a good baby!

look at that black hair!!

you were crying, and daddy held you..and you stopped. magic. :)

so happy you're here

hey little bug,

welcome to our family! we've all been waiting soooo long for you to be here..it felt like you were incubating forever. i was so excited, every time your mom called (about a month prior to your arrival), i would excitedly answer the phone, thinking she had an update about you. sadly, it was always something trivial like "can you fax these documents for me?"

then finally, on that fateful saturday, she texted me. she was at the hospital, and would update me if they were going to admit her. 15 mins later, she called and said she was admitted, but that i should take my time...no rush, she'd be there all day. i grabbed my bag, quickly got ready, and kissed uncle jared goodbye. i showed up at the hospital with magazines, and sat there....impatiently waiting for you to give mommy contractions. that was about 1:30pm.

around 5pm, mommy started getting some contractions....still pretty bearable.

at around 8pm, the lights were dimmed...she was getting pretty big ones. your grandma and grandpa were there, daddy was in the room with mommy, auntie kim was there, and uncle jared was there too! they only allowed up to 3 visitors, so we kept switching in and out. finally, at around 10pm, ba ngoai and ong ngoai finally showed up..and your mommy was in a LOT of pain...so the nurse came in, and said it was almost time!

daddy stood by mommy's head, and held mommy's hand...and i stood right by on the other side of her, peeping in to look for you. we encouraged her to push when she felt a contraction, and she did..so bravely! i could tell she was in soo soo much pain, but she kept on, all natural, without the epidural. your mommy's a superhero, did you know that??

after a few pushes, i could see your little head...and all that beautiful black hair...we told her to push again, and you started coming out. it was so magical--i was at a loss of words. one more push, and your tiny head popped out. to my surprise, at that exact same moment, tears streamed down my face, and as my voice broke, i told mommy "she's so so beautiful....thao...push one more time, you can do it!" so as she was bearing down, i came to her side, lifted up her head, and told her to open her eyes. she used every single fiber in her body to open them, look at you, and give it one last push!

you were out! she did it!! we all did it, and you were here--perfect, crying, and tiny on that blue plastic slide.

i'm so grateful i was able to be the first to see you come into this world...and ever since that moment, all i want to do is protect you, and love you. our family isn't perfect, but what we do have is immense and unconditional love and devotion for one another. you are just the most precious thing to us, and we all hope you can grow to be a smart, witty, and strong young woman. february 22, 2014..you showed up and forever changed all our lives!

these are photos from right after you were born:

your amaaaaaazing supershero mommy!

just finished crying like a baby because you were so perfectly tiny